I don’t know about you but does it seem the holidays bring all the questions concerning your relationship status? Family, friends, the lady checking you out at the grocery store LOL, like why is this the first question people ask you if you are single?
No, Hey how are you doing kicking ass running those 2 businesses and raising two kids, training for Crossfit competitions, creating and you know everything else in your life, but are you dating anyone? It cracks me up. I promise...I will let you know if I meet someone I think is worth discussing...I will. No need to ask. AND I haven’t told you about it because I haven’t found someone I think is worth it. PERIOD.
It is annoying, to say the least, but it also can conjure up some real emotion inside, especially if you have been out in today’s dating world, SWIPE MUCH?!?! You tried, failed (and I mean the encounter failed NOT you), tried again, and feeling lonely. I was there for several years (been single for 5).
Then there are all the social posts of couples enjoying all the holiday cheer, professing love, and the happy perfect families…sorry but most of that is BS best reels. I am so incredibly happy for those couples who do have that and I know some solid couples crushing the marriage/relationship game that I admire, but none of them are posting it on social...just saying.
So for all you sexy singles out there here is what I have to say to you. You are crushing it! You are not a failure, loser, or less than your relationship defined peers. You actually have one up because you have the opportunity to be entirely invested in yourself, and to be honest most relationships fail because people do not focus on their own growth and dreams. They get lost in a relationship before they ever have a chance to figure out who they are. Use this time to heal, work on yourself, dream big, and chase those goals you want. You do not need a relationship to define who you are. If you feel lonely look at what it is inside you that you are missing? Are you engaging in toxic behavior? Do you have habits you don’t like? Do you do things you want to do or are you waiting on someone to do them with?
I get it, we are wired to connect, desire sex (there are solutions to this 😜), feel love, and I do want all those things, but I would WAY rather be alone than deal with some of the BS I have come across while dating (stay tuned for the said book I’ll be writing...ha ha). I used to get down, won’t lie. I used to think that there was something wrong with me that I was attracting the same narcissistic person over and over. I was not clear on what I wanted, just wanted something...all ending in me being even more alone and keeping the vibration LOW af...which I why I kept attracting those same type of people.
A wise friend one day said to me one day when I was teary and down, and I felt it, “Maybe you just have to be OK with being alone”. At the time I was like I don’t want to...I want what I see everyone else has, but now I get it...I do, and I am more than 100% OK with being alone. I know that he is coming and when he does I will be ready, completely grounded, and secure in myself, what I want, and what we can build together. I will not settle...not even a little tiny bit. Until then I’ll just be over here traveling the world, raising two amazing children and 1 fur baby, and following all my dreams and passions.
Keep that head up buttercup. You got this. Don’t let the holidays get you down. You are a single sexy smart individual and your time will come. When someone asks you if your dating say yeah, myself and he/she is a badass self-reliant Muther F***** 😘